Cody is a gorgeous indoor palm who has a place close to my heart.
I’ve had Cody since he was a tiny plant in one of those little brown plastic pots at the Home Depot. Perhaps you may be wondering why a personal narrative has a houseplant in the starring role.
My reply would be why ever not?
To an unbiased observer, there may seem nothing particularly remarkable about this potted palm but Cody is extraordinary in many ways, some barely perceptible but nevertheless present. You see, Cody and I share the history and it’s no exaggeration when I say that drawing inspiration from this frondy friend helped pull me back from the downward spiral into depression.
It may sound dramatic but if we think about how people have been able to get a handle on the blues and derive a sense of comfort through their interactions with pets then a leap of faith to include those of the herbaceous variety might not seem in the realm of the impossible.
Cody, like me, has been through some tough times. He once suffered the awful predicament of being flung out of the window, planter and all, for no fault other than being an object of my affection.
What better way to inflict pain than to destroy out of spite what someone has lovingly nurtured?
A kindred spirit to whom I’ll always be grateful to venture out to retrieve and carefully replant poor broken Cody. At some point, Cody was banished to a lonely corner of the study, neglected, and left to fend for himself.
Like me, he stopped thriving and was vibrant no longer. Leaves wilted and crisped with brown spots galore yet he stubbornly continued to cling onto life.
I’d like to think we both focused on surviving one day at a time — just breathing and functioning despite running on fumes. Looking back to those melancholy-filled days, I wonder how Cody might have described his feelings if he had a voice: Abandoned? Unwanted? Ugly? And how did this brave little palm muster the strength to survive the odds?
Have you ever had the misfortune of experiencing the sensation of being slowly but steadily smothered until you are overcome by the fear that unless you did something to escape it soon, it would be too late? Well, for me that feeling reached critical mass on the day my eyes were truly opened to Cody’s plight. The indignities this blameless plant had to put up with because of human callousness was appalling and I made a vow to remedy that by taking good care of Cody from thereon.
My personal epiphany occurred in the midst of gently pruning the desiccated leaves off my houseplant. To this day I’m unsure whether it was the result of the soothing words I whispered to Cody as I worked to rid him of dead weight or perhaps it was the mesmerizing effect of those discolored leaves dropping sluggishly to the ground, whatever it was, Cody’s sigh of relief was distinctly palpable at that moment.
It prompted me to ponder my own bleak existence, a topic I had been ignoring long enough. What was sucking the life out of me that I awoke each morning with a heart so heavy and filled with dread for the day ahead? Like my scrappy pal here, could I look forward to a new lease on life if I could somehow summon the strength to pull myself out of this place of abject misery?
To be perfectly honest, I had been doubtful about Cody making it back from the edge of the abyss but to my delight, this hardy little plant proved me wrong! Following regular doses of TLC, Cody began to flourish enthusiastically and this amazing transformation finally put an end to my vacillation.
As we know, a decision to take back control requires a few key elements:
The willpower to reach deep within the fossilized rock that the mind has become and locate that tiny vein of hope that simply refuses to die
To believe in the gospel truth that you are in no way a loser and neither are you a mentally weak ***t.
And to diligently repeat like a mantra the positive affirmations written on the yellow sticky notes lining your bathroom mirror — that you are indeed beautiful and worthy of love and respect.
I won’t deny that some days felt like Sisyphus rolling the boulder up the mountain but as they say, it takes a village and I am humbled each time I think about the love and support that poured out from my die-hard friends, support group, and family members.
Suffice to say, I was able to roll the boulder up the darn mountain and over into the sea hundreds of feet below. I must say the resounding splash when it was deep-sixed was extremely satisfying!
Today as I type away at my laptop, Cody sits near me at his favorite spot by the window, feathered fronds unfurling in the warm caress of the sun. Initially, writing about Cody dredged up the swamp so to speak but subsequently helped immensely in processing the pain associated with that event and towards the end felt a sense of profound peace in laying that memory to rest.
I continue to be a work in progress as some wounds are so deeply embedded in the psyche that it still needs more work and healing. These words from a favorite quote by Steve Maraboli help put things in perspective for the journey ahead “The truth is unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”
There is so much to be learned by our own real-life experiences with nature. Wonderful piece!
It is really heart warming piece. I like how you see yourself in the living beings of the universe. A plant has many useful lessons to teach us if we take the time connect with them through our hearts. This article is a unique and creative piece. Will continue reading all your other stories. :)